typical males

pandas in 'who can p*ss highest' competition. Tsk. That panda, can't take him anywhere.


 

koff splutter sneeze

We is poorly sick. I've got a nasty cold and O's got a horrid koff. Hurrah for Tixylix & calpol for O, and fancy tissues with balsam for me (otherwise I think my nose might've dropped off by now).

lots of good fun that is funny

fun things to do on Friday/Saturday

be taught to hoola-hoop by a gaggle of 5 year old girls, meet Jude woooo, drink with Jude, eat with Jude, gossip with Jude, go shopping for shiny things at Claire's Accessories, discover fabby shiny glittery eye-shadow, have nice long Lush-enhanced bath, get dressed up in new shiny things and go for Big Night Out, eat nachos twice in one day, enjoy dub music as it's meant to be (ie pumping out through enormous speakers that are in breach of several international conventions), drink orange wkd through a straw, get the night bus home, have a Saturday morning lie-in cos your child slept at someone else's house hurrah, stage puppet theatre re-enactment of the GingerBread Man (after retrieving child)

post for jude

everyone else move along, nothing here to see

zinc, map 1, map 2 (with 'helpful' notes)

can you leave me a message or txt me to say you got these OK?

who do you think I am?

Copying off of Jude (again), I have made a quiz all about me me me hurrah

Take my Quiz on QuizYourFriends.com!

baby steps

Going to aquarobics on a cold wet night (and missing first half of IAC as a result boo). Having thai bites @ 100 cals instead of pistachios @ 500 +. Thinking ahead and buying something reasonably healthy for tomorrow's lunch. Baby steps ...

tech talk

I'm thinking of adding a dvd writer to my puter - does anyone know if it's hard to do it myself, or should I start baking [1]?



[1] I pay my tech-support hippy in vegan baked goods

busy doing nothing

had a very lazy weekend, just lying around being blebby. Hardly even went outside since Friday. No exercise and a load of eating. I'm beginning to perceive a pattern to the eating madness. I get this huge urge to binge when I know I'm going to be alone. So, on Saturday, I stocked up on piles of cr@p and gorged myself. I know this behaviour has its roots back in how food was managed in our house when I was a kid. But that was then and this is now. I need to stop letting my past control my future. Yeah cos that's so easy to do . I'm going to try to reign it in this week. Today, I'm promising myself that if I don't go out and buy cr@p, I can have lunch in the cafe.

Apologies in advance if this blog suffers from I'm A Celebrity fever - posting here may slow down somewhat but it's only for 2 weeks.

you can never be too rich, to thin or have too many blogs

Hurrah I have started a I'm a Sleb blog (it's called Clazza's for now but that may change if any special guest-star bloggers join me)

belly ballroom dancing round the living room

owing to feeling extremely lazy, I lay on the sofa and watched Can't Sing Won't Sing and then Strictly Come Dancing. (I have avoided them so far, and do hope I'm not going to get hooked now. I don't have room in my life for more (un)reality tv, not with IACGMOOH starting tomorrow). Anyways, I was trying to laze about but two of the couples danced to (horrid house band stylee covers of) songs we have most weeks at belly dancing - Simarik (Kiss Kiss) (actually they did a cover of Holly Valance's English language cover ouch!) and Whenever, Wherever. So my attempts to laze about were wrecked by an outbreak of involuntary shimmying (tho I did resist the urge to don any of last night's sparkly gubbins).


Random IAC factoid of the day: Brian Harvey is afraid of water (he can't swim), spiders, heights. Makes total sense to go on the show and face those watery spider-rich Bushtucker Trials, which you have to cross high up rope bridges to get to. Nice to see him prepared to pay a high price for a couple of weeks' coverage in Heat magazine fame.

Belly dancing news: had fabby time at the party last night. Most people were dressed up and looked fantastic, and a room full of women dancing and enjoying themselves makes for a wonderful atmosphere. My sis loved it, it was different to her expectations (she'd been expecting something more Carry on Cleo ... all together now "infamy, infamy ... "). If she lived near by, she'd be signing up for classes.

Undertones news: got the house to myself this afternoon. Sis went back home this morning, R's at a conference and O's gone to a party. Have been nursing very slight hangover (curse those alcopops - when you've shimmied up a thirst, orange WKD with a straw slips down all too quickly) by lying on the sofa reading the paper and listening to the Undertones (watch out for that link - great band, crap site - it plays music at you without asking first and is all frames grrr) at high volume.

I do love the Undertones. They were the first 'proper' band I was really into, and their second album was the first proper (ie not Top of The Pops) album I bought. Teenage Kicks has been played so much recently, I suppose it will always be the John Peel Song. I love that they did not re-release it as some kind of 'tribute'/cash-in. Pop stars with ethics, how old fashioned is that? I do like some of their new stuff, too. Shame that Feargal Sharkey went off and turned into an arse after he left the band (those deck-shoes-without-sandals photos in Smash Hits make me shudder just thinking about them. I know it as the 80s but there are limits), but the rest of them have kept on rocking and their new singer's not at all bad. We saw them live in Derry last year.

You know how some bands get all precious about their back catalogue and insist on doing their latest work in its entirety before grudgingly doing one of the old hits? The Undertones are not like that at all. They played all of everyone's faves and threw in a few of their new ones, too. It was a bit of shock seeing those (whisper it) old blokes up on stage, tho. If they've gone and aged in the past mumble mumble years, maybe that means I have too. Eeep.

on being professional

Working from home means, most of the time, you can wear what you want. After a while though, the novelty value of going to work in your jim-jams every day (even the snuggly fleecy ones with fluffy seals on them) wears off. Nowadays I just settle for whatever's clean and comes to hand first in the morning.

Scary FlyLady would not approve. She says you have to dress smartly at all times and put on proper lace-up shoes (they absolutely must be lace-ups, no slacking about in slip ons) the minute you get up in the morning. I dread to think what she'd make of my new stripey slipper socks with detatchable Eeyores but I don't care. They are snuggly and keep my toes warm, and make me happy and cosy in a way even my beloved DMs can't.

I once signed up for the FlyLady's email service, despite being strongly advised against it by the person who told me about her in the first place. Big mistake. My hotmail account was overflowing with emails on the importance of wearing lace-up shoes, how to achieve the perfect shiny sink, and proper care of a feather duster. Dear FlyLady, life's too short to blow dry a feather duster. If anyone who knows me found me doing such a thing, they'd march me straight down to the doctors to get the OCD diagnosis officially confirmed. Which reminds me, there was a really funny article about living with OCD in the Observer magazine on Sunday.

Eating news: ack. still bad.

new deal

I've made a deal with myself. I can let the eating go for now but I have to keep up the exercise. I didn't make it to aquarobics on Monday due to being forced to go to the pub instead, but I'm definitely going tonight. Cycled a few miles this morning, visiting the Asian markets in search of Shiny Things to shiny up my outfit for the belly dancing party on Friday night.

I've paranoid about being horribly under-dressed. I know some of the women at the other classes spend most of their spare time constructing elaborate home-made costumes, and I suspect even my sister, who's going to go with me, is bound to have something very glam to wear. Ah well. I'll just load myself up with shiny hair clips, just-about-fit-if-forced-on-with-aid-of-soap Indian bangles & jangly fabric trim with teeny silver bells and shimmy with the best of 'em.

Other news: I just found out that dub legend the Mad Professor is live at the Band on the Wall a week on Friday. A week on Friday it will be 10 years to the day since R & I first met. And guess where me first me? Yup, BotW (although at a very different kind of gig). So I guess that pretty much sorts out what we're doing for our anniversary.

Other other news: IACGMOOH4 line up announced wooooooooooo hoooooooooo! I love IAC. I become easily addicted to (un)reality tv shows. Even R, brainiac intellectual who hardly watches TV, has gotten addicted to the past 2 series. Still gutted that they didn't let Frank Carson on it, tho. He had his own wellies and everything.

in need of some religious guidance

Good point well made, Mr. Duncan. As you clearly say, it states in Leviticus Chapter 18 Verse 22 that homosexuality is an abomination. Which reminds me—there are a couple of things I need guidance on. Firstly, If I wanted to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7, how much could I expect to make from such a deal? Also, my colleague Pete insists on working on the sabbath. Exodus clearly says he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or is it OK to get some outside help? Lastly, does the whole city really have to be together to stone my brother John for planting different crops side by side. And when I burn my mother for wearing garments made from two different threads, do I torch her whole or just a bit?

Jeremy Hardy
(thanks to the The Unofficial Jeremy Hardy Page for this)

it's good to get nice surprises

Like when you're dragged to 'jam night' at the local pub, sit through some stripey-jumpered-trombone-and-sax j*zz combo (nice!) and then up gets some elderly Jamaican bloke, borrows a guitar and sounds like he's stepped right out of a Trojan ska cd.

you may say I'm a cynic, but I'm not the only one

... a quick round-up of some alternative views of BandAid 2004

20 years ago perhaps we could get away with a naive belief that the 'hey kids, let's put on a show!' approach could do anything about solving world poverty. Well, I could get away with it at least, cos hey I was 17 and didn't know any better. But in the last 20 years I've learned some stuff. Including that whatever St Bob of Geldof says, it's not about the money. Not about the money raised for charidee, at any rate. If current patterns of world trade and global inequalities remain, no amount of charidee records will stop millions starving.

And even 20 years ago, I wasn't completely naive. A short list of things that annoyed me about the original BandAid/LiveAid:

1 - David Bowie complaining that 'the government' wasn't giving enough money to famine relief. Scuse me Mr David 'lives abroad in tax exile' Bowie, where exactly do you think the government's going to get some money from to do owt about owt?

2 - the picture created of all Ethiopians, all Africans, as helpless starving victims. The first time I met someone from Ethiopia, the year after LiveAid, I was genuinely surprised to meeting a non-starving Ethiopian. (It's a little publicised fact that more money now flows into the developing world from the remittances of migrant workers, than from foreign aid).

3 - Bono's famous 'tonight thank god it's them instead of you' line always disturbed me. Of course I am profoundly grateful that it's not me, but I don't want it not to be me at the expense of 'them'.

Letter in Observer Music Monthly from Bert Erikten Cate

Leaving aside the artistic qualities of such a project, I wonder why these artists are so keen to lend their voices. Is it because they care about Africa, or about their own image? If they really cared, surely they could have found the words and a tune to vent their anger about the inequality in the world.

Piece on the Guardian's newsblog by Jon Dennis

Yes, yes, yes, we all know it's a good cause. Dur. But why should we be so grateful to these millionaires for their precious time? They could just donate a large chunk of their not-so-hard-earned cash if they care so passionately about it. Just a suggestion.

From the Chumbas (who released the 'Pictures of Starving Children..' album in 1986)

... the song remains the same: carefully scripted emotion, tears instead of anger and no explanations of why the world is in a permanent crisis. Twenty years ago Band Aid reflected a peculiar brand of ignorance; Africa was portrayed as being at the mercy of the weather. We had video shots of fly blown children, dry water holes and popstars arriving at recording studios. Anything else like the West''s over consumption, the way that free trade exploits, collusion with military dictatorships and corrupt governments on all sides was probably deemed too complex. Twenty years on we have a better understanding of what 'free trade' actually means in terms of diverting resources like land away from food production and towards goods that are shipped and consumed in the West, we know about the deals that go on behind the scenes, we even know that Western governments fund terror, after all the C.I.A. trained, threw cash at and aided and abetted Bin Laden in Afghanistan. We can do without returning to an age where we pretended popstars can solve famine by fighting over who sings the chorus.

And no, the irony of a diet blogger, blogging about starving children isn't lost on me.

is your MP doing what s/he said on the tin?

TheyWorkForYou.com

a site that grabs Hansard by the scruff of the neck, shakes it up and republishes it in a slick format that's easily accessible to political junkies and casual surfers alike. Want to find out what your local MP thinks about Iraq? Or how likely they are to vote against their party? Or how safe their seat is? Just enter your postcode and theyworkforyou.com will tell you all that and more.

go stalk your MP and start making the democratic process a teeny bit more accountable. (Site found during my morning gruaniad-browse).

if it's Sunday it must be ..

... Observer [food/sport/music/other]* Monthly day hurrah. Music Monthly today, so I can stock up on ideas for musics to download purchase this month. Also there was a feature on Trin's eldest and her bessie mate, which was nice.

I am so not sending OMM an email pointing out that they got the name of the band in Eastenders wrong [1] because that would be sad. I'm not going to do it, really I'm not ... /turns off puter & goes for a bath and a lie down before the urge overwhelmes me ...



* delete as appropriate

[1] they were called The Banned not The Band - so called because they got banned from playing in the Vic. Yes I knew that without googling. I'm not proud but then again, this was way back in the mists of time, when I were a lass and Eastenders were good. Ask yer parents about it kids, they'll tell you all about Ye Goode Olde Dayes in Ye Square.

fairground attractions

So, it's Eid this weekend and O is still disgusted that we are denying him his Islamic heritage, on the flimsy grounds of his having exclusively Scottish/Irish, (formerly) Protestant/Catholic (both now atheist) parentage. What kind of exuse is that? A party's a party, after all, so last night we decided to take him to the fun fair that's on in Rusholme as part of the Eid festivities.

O was so excited. I think he was under the impression we'd finally recognised his Muslim identity. Plus, when you're five, going out after dark is an adventure in itself. He was nearly bursting by the time we got to the fairground. Seen through the eyes of a five year old, fairgrounds stop being seedy, tatty, tawdry, over-priced disappointments, and go back to being magical, exciting places full of lights and colour.

O went on a couple of the little-kid rides, but was feeling grown-up enough for some of the 'real' rides too. We went on the bumper cars twice, and even on the waltzers (I used to love waltzers, but I'm sure they must have got faster since I were a lass, I felt a bit queasy after last night's ride). Very disappointed that there was no proper candyfloss onna stick, tho - only stoopid bags of it. I was going to buy O some candyfloss n'all, but not if it's not onna stick! That bag candyfloss is vile and tastes like sugared cotton wool, not like the proper fresh stuff onna stick that makes your whole face sticky. Bah to progress, if progress means candyfloss in a bag.

Eid Mubarak

about Eid ul Fitr