I don't want to shock anyone who thinks I'm all sweetness and light, but I like a spliff as much as the next woman¹ (provided it's made with 'tobacco' from those vile herbal fags rather than real fags, Mr Nick O'Teen being a far more evil villain than Ms Mary Jane). I've always been squeamish about the kind of cr@p you have to through to get. I've always got poxy little sixteenths off of friends who got if off someone else who got it off someone else who had the bottle to go and see the dealer for a big(gish) lump. And that's the trouble with draw, what with it being illegal and all, that somewhere along the line you have to deal with some fairly unpleasant people to get hold of it.

I was thinking about this yesterday while chatting with some local peeps over at the ramps, people who are all anti-corporate this and fair-trade that but smoke fags, smoke draw and probably lots of other stuff to. Yeah cos cigarette companies are so ethical innit? And drug dealers, too. We were talking about the young lad who got shot dead last weekend, not so far away from here. Almost certainly by gangs fighting over the local drug trade (tho the kid himself wasn't in a gang and ffs even if he was, he was 15, no-one deserves to get gunned down in a park at 15 years old). OK I know they're fighting over the heroin and crack trades, but the draw is part of the same system. And it's not exactly produced in an ethical manner². Wtf is the point of rolling up a Camberwell Carrot with a the baccy from a Silk Cut and experiencing a warm smug glow as you drink your mug of CafeDirect?

Sorry about the rambling rant. Partly I am angry about the kid getting shot and worried about what will happen to O if he grows up round here, and partly I have been having the odd twinge of smoking-lust (particularly when seeing someone unwrap a fresh pack of Marlboro Lights) that I'm talking myself out of. Plus my usual ongoing rage at fluffy minded hippy foolishness.

Oh yes and I am also angry cos the council have tried to bulldozer down our ramps. Something local people have put lots of time and effort into making, something that gives kids on bikes something to do other than be drug dealer's runners, something constructive, and the feckers want to knock it down.

So no more fags or other drug's for me. I leave you with the words of Nigel Blackwell:

She stayed with me until
She moved to Notting Hill.
She said it was the place she had to be.
Where the cocaine is Free Trade
And frequently displayed
Is the Buena Vista Social Club CD.

1. Unless the next woman was C in her heyday. No-one like a spliff better than C in her heyday.
2. Also that hydroponically grown stuff is bad nasty stuff. And anyway I don't need an attack of the munchies either

being a good mummy

to my cats, at least. Spent a hundred quid on them at the Vee Eee Tee. They both have fleas urgh and poor Fergus has a nasty flea allergy aww so they needed pills and lotions and injections and what not. He wasn't talking to me after, at least not until I produced the shiny new brush I got them in the hope of fending off the hair balls.

In O's books I have not been such a good mummy to him lately. Having noticed how cheeky he was becoming, and particulary his habit of wailing and whinging to try and get his own way, we are having a bit of a clamp down. Poor boy ended up doing himself out of the packet of jaffa cakes he was looking forward to. I can but hope he'll get the message eventually ...

Eating is crap, or rather I am crap at eating. I cannot seem to break the bingeing habit. I have been eating better this past week or so, since I re-started my WL efforts, but still overeating. Sigh. At least I'm getting the exercise, 2 belly dance classes a week plus bits of cycling and pilates too hurrah, also we are trying to keep the house clean (and will have to have a massive anti-flea hoovering effort) and even loathsome housework burns calories.

Having finally got the dreaded inorganic chemistry assignment out of the way (stayed up all night on Friday to finish it, it was v poor in the end but hey ho it's finished and in) I can now move onto cramming 6 weeks' of organic synthesis into 2 weeks. But at least it is my beloved organic chemistry hurrah (plus if I'm really stuck I can impose on poor long suffering K again). Then it's 4 weeks of revision for my first exam in 20 years waaaaah. But at least I am booked on a cramming weekend although very unfairly R is going to Leipzig that same weekend. Unfair, he gets all the fun.

No chemistry was done yesterday, cos we had a family day out - me, O & R plus my mum & dad who got in free cos it was grandparent's day - at Gulliver's World. O said it was even better than the last time cos he got to go on the Antelope roller coaster and not just once but twice. Plus he had his grandad with him and they adore each other - dad had even given up golf to be there, that's how much he loves no. 1 grandson.

Eating has been not brilliant but OK, apart from one binge on Friday. We went out on Saturday night and there was wine, pizza and pudding (although the diet gods must have been watching as there was only one piece of cheesecake left so we had to share it). Took a picnic with us on Sunday, not a perfect weight loss picnic but better than eating fried sh*t at the theme park. I have to keep remembering it's all about babysteps and must not expect to undo years of poor eating in a few weeks.

bah

Weigh in day today, I've gained a pound boo. But it may be a totm thing. My eating wasn't ideal (I ended up a day's worth of points over on the week eep) but exercising has been good (cycling, pilates x 2, belly dancing x 2) and I've been trying to drink more water. Next week will be better, I'm sure.

Everything is kind of getting back to normal. O has gone back to school and I have gone back to dieting. Had a blip yesterday - I was out all day (6 am to 11 pm) and while I was more careful that I would have been, it wasn't a good day foodwise. But apart from that I have kept at the pointing and the drinking water and such so far, and I've been exercising too - cycling, pilates, belly dancing.

Went for a bike ride on Sunday and during our 20 mile trundle, crossed paths with some riders out doing the Manchester 100. What with one thing and another we didn't do enough miles to go in for the 100 km this year (never mind the 100 miles). Maybe next year ...

g'night mate

Steve Irwin died in freak stingray-sting-to-the-heart incident. I loved Steve Irwin, he was mad as a box of frogs but so phenominally enthusiastic about the dangerous animals he got ludicrously close to.

O has made me promise we will never go to Australia. His current wildlife loon hero is Austin "Snakemaster" Stevens, a high-camp, hammed-up, Irwin-lite, who runs around the bush annoying deadly snakes and getting all dramatic about how quickly their venom would kill him, because obviously his film crew and production company aren't standing right next to him with a bottle of anti-venom. He does that ludicrous thing you never see anyone else do any more, of pretending he is all alone in the wild. Bah, he don't wrestle crocs and he ain't a patch on Crocodile Hunter Steve (or Crocodile Nutter as I misheard on the radio this morning, but it's quite apt really).

good start

Weighed myself this morning - I know I only did it on Monday but I want to have Friday as my regular weighing day - and I've lost 2.5 lb hurrah but erm I may but some of that back on tonight as we are going out to our friendly neighourhood Malaysian eaterie.

OK gotta go and observer the local street theatre - the council are trying to take away a neighbour's car for some reason (probably it's not taxed etc) but has they were winching it up he got in it and locked himself in, so now there's bit of an impasse.

the North East coast - a users guide

I had to work oop North-er, so we all three piled in the car and went to see how C's leg is doing. She is out of plaster but not really mobile yet, so we did a bit of whizzing about shopping and such. But mainly we did tourist things. O was thoroughly spoiled with sweets & toys from C (plus a trip to the fab cheap charity shop for games & books), plus masses of trips out and about. We don't usually go on trips to theme parks and such, certainly not 4 in as many days!

On the day I was working, R took O to DiggerLand, which was a great hit. He absolutely adored it, said it was as good as Gulliver's World. Cost of entry: £12 each (but if you take your lunch you don't need to spend anymore money if you can avoid the gift shop). Having the best day of your life twice in one month and you get to boast to every other small boy you meet about how you've driven a real digger: priceless

Next day was sunny so we headed for the coast. C came along for the ride, she couldn't get about much but her leg means she hasn't had much chance to get out and about this summer. We went up to Seahouses and had a proper British seaside day out. First up, (fish &) chips followed by ice-creams. Next down to the beach for some light rockpooling and then we took a boat trip to the Farne Islands. There are several boat operators but C advised that Billy Shiel is the best, so off we went on Glad Tidings V to see some seals. And we did see seals, and birds too, tho we were too late for puffins boo. I always wanted to see a puffin, so we'll have to go back earlier in the year next time. Anyway the boat trip was great on a sunny afternoon and afterwards, O got some candyfloss (did I mention C spoils him?) then we had a round of crazy golf, which was fun but not very crazy.

Then the next day it was off to The Alnwick Garden. Which is nice but not eight-quid-a-head's worth of nice, even if kids do get in free. The treehouse was a great disappointment, it's just a glorified caff. Presumably with glorified prices, but we had our own sarnies hah. The leaflets asking to help them fundraise for the 'next phase' stuck in the craw after the price of the entry, too. And don't get me started on the overpriced gift shops at every turn ... Still, the water features are good for kids on a warm day - although we could get wet at home for nothing.

Saturday we went home 'via' Hull (my grasp of UK geography is tenuous, unfortunately I had mentioned this trip to O before checking with R that Durham and Hull were actually relatively close because they're both on the east coast). Why Hull?

The Deep of course. Go. It's fantastic. Well if you like fishes and sharks and such it is, and what's not to like?

Back home, back to normal, back to course work avoidance. I have piles to do and I can't face it. I have been putting it off for days weeks. It's so dull. Inorganic chemistry is so dull. I realise that to normal people, differentiating levels of dullness within chemistry seems unnecessary, but chemistry types will understand. I'm also sure there are people who love inorganic chemistry but I'm an organic gal at heart. At least it has decided me against taking inorganic as my second level 3 course. It'll be physical for me, hard sums and all.

I'll tell you how bad things are. Not only am I writing long blog posts as a displacement activity, I've even been cleaning the house. Even the dreaded FlyLady would approve of my house right now. That's how bad it's got, even housework is preferable to the elements of the p-block.

Back news: it's much better than it was, but I have to be careful to look after it. No more slouching and slobbing, now I have to sit up straight help help I am being assimilated by some kind of Stretford Wife droid waaaah. I :heart: my squishy cushion that I use to support my back tho, it's lovely and squidgy and it helps. I'm going back to belly dancing from next week (I haven't been for months because I didn't have time but if I want to not to be crippled with backache I have to make time) and I'm going to start going to pilates on Saturday.

Diet news: is going OK, but I must remember that buying oatcakes is the diet equivalent of a false economy. I eat and eat and eat them. Question is, is it better to 'binge' on a few oatcakes than run out for Pringles? OK I think I just worked that out ...

well

Day 1 went OK, stuck to my points etc. Day 2 hasn't been bad so far, either. I am not looking forward to the long haul, tho. But I suppose the trick is not to think about that but only about the next day or hour or 10 minutes.

No chocolate or crisps for 2 days is an unusual acheivement for me, from my recent eating habits. I've even clocked up all my water today wooo.

could've been worse

Day 1 of Project Restart Weightloss Efforts. I've decided to follow the WW plan (using their on-line tracking) but not go to the actual Fatclub Meetings. I've tried a few and have never yet found a leader who inspires me (not £5 a week worth of inspiration, anyway). So I bought some new scales and weighed myself this morning. Have gained half a stone since I last looked, but haven't gone back up to my previous highest.

Jolly bank holiday full of cleaning, studying and cooking vats of low-calorie vegetable soup to get on with now, hurrah.

oh b*gg*r

I've done me back in. I just bent over to pick something up and ow it hurt. It still hurts. I went to the doctor; of course she told me my weight is probably the reason for back trouble. So, I have to start the weight loss thing again, perhaps this will be the incentive I need. I certainly don't want to go on having back problems, it is horrible and makes me feel about 92 years old.

How many calories in co-codamol & ibuprofen?

bad blogger's bullet points

• Graduation was stressful but worthwhile (also the house now looks nice for once), R looked great in his robes and funny hat and is a doctor at last hurrah, and I thoroughly recommend Le Petit Blanc for a family celebration


• Summer School was last week, it was fraught and frantic and far too hot, I nearly lost it in the middle of the week but fortunately the work let up slightly and the weather got slightly cooler and it became more bearable, so I made it to the end. And I did enjoy being back in a lab again. Now I just have the assignments to finish


• School Holidays are here so we have to look after our own kids bah. Took O to Gulliver's World yesterday, he said it was the best day of his life.


• Work Work Work is still always here, I have a report to write for Work-work and an assignment to finish for OU-work, before we go on holiday.


• Summer Holidays are next week, we are off first thing on Sunday for 2 weeks. Waah, half of me wishes I could stay at home and catch up with my life.

not waving but ...

... drowning under a tsunami of flat packs, paint, assignments, worry about shoes and the exact shade of green for the pashmina my fashun consultants tell me I need to get to go with my New For The Graduation dress (as picture but brown with cream spots instead of black & white), reports, meetings, trips to London, trips to Ikea, power tools¹, cleaning products², broken legged best friends, free vodka, trips to the tip, new white goods, washing & ironing, booking tables at posh restaurant, being too hot, fretting, worrying and panicking



I haven't even found time to order my copy of Key to the Identification of Academic Hoods of the British Isles, so sadly I shall miss out on the opportunities for academic twitching. Although I am hoping the Mongolian robes make another appearance.

1. tip of the day: do not let stressed, pre-menstrual, sleep deprived, living on diet pepsi, peanut butter, pitta bread & bananas, women lose with industrial strength hammer drills. They get very upset if the wall moves and makes their hole not straight.

2. several pods of dolphins have been sacrificed already

well it's not like I was busy

I gave C a quick ring yesterday (need second opinion on the exact wording of the engraving to be engraved on R's graduation pressie), only it ended up not being quick as she'd broken her ankle that morning (and this time, for possibly the first time in her long history of injuries, she hadn't even been drinking). She tends to not pay much heed to advice to 'rest' so wisely they have refused to give her a weight-bearing cast for at least a week. In fact they have told her she must lie down for a week, she can't even sit up. OMG. And she is the carer for her 80+ year old mother, who has limited mobility although fortunately (in this context at least) her primary care needs are emotional rather than physical. Unfortunately they live 120 miles away and I cannot get away from work this week and then I have a dayschool on Saturday, but I'm going up there on Saturday evening for a few days to get the shopping in and stuff. Oh and I've been volunteered for another working group on local issues. Ah well, ask a busy woman and all that (right up until the time she starts screaming hysterically ...)

must ... breath ... deeply

must ... not .... panic

Until today my to-do list for the next month looked like this:

• catch up on course work I am behind on
• complete assignment for main course
• do preparation for summer school
• do assignments for summer school
• draft poster presentation for summers chool
• go to summer school
  
• write 1 long report for work
• write 3 short reports for work
• spend several days working away
• do stuff with O (eg swimming, bike rides, theatre)
• spend a couple of hours a week on community committments
• lose several stone
• try to remember to do shopping, wash clothes etc

... the thought of all of which was starting to stress me out but I thought no, I can manage this if I get myself organised, it is do-able. And then today, I find out that I have to add

• gut house from top to bottom (or move)

R is graduating this summer after all. I had convinced myself that it wouldn't be until the winter now, because the assessment boycott meant that his external examiners hadn't looked at his revised thesis. But now the dispute is settled and the examiners have examined and he is going to graduate on July 12. Which I should be happy about, as it's been 5 years of hard work for him to get to this. Instead I have been in floods of tears at the prospect of his parents coming to visit in less than a month.

We don't actually know if they are coming yet. Although it's unlikely they would want to stay at home for the traditional cultural events, they are going to forn parts the week after so maybe they might not come. It sounds horrible to say it but I hope they don't, I do not need the hassle. R suggested we pay to put them up in a hotel, which sounds a terrible thing to do, but would be better than them staying here, at least we wouldn't have to make the bedrooms fit for parental habitation.

-

doing the timewarp

My life has regressed 20 years. I've listened to Half Man Half Biscuit non-stop for 3 days and tomorrow my friend K is coming over to help me with my chemistry. I met K at university the first time I went; unlike me he paid attention, did his homework and became Dr K and now senior academic Dr K. So I'm taking advantage of our 20 year friendship to blag some tuition, to help me catch up. I hope he can help me understand how to calculate the energies of Frenkel defects in silver halides (and also why one would even want to).

gratuitious random rant

I hate stoopid feckin hippies with their soya milk and their non-functioning tvs and their dirty messy vile white 'dreads' and/or asymetric hair-don'ts and their meals of vegan slops and their utterly self-centre self-obsessed 'hey let's not get heavy' world view which causes them to take no concern for or responsibility for the impact of their actions on others.

Thank you for listening.

experimenting

Me and my zen are experimenting with new music from my audioscrobbler recommendations. Playing with my toys beats working hurrah (and boo to my now-overdue assignment err ...). Meanwhile O has been doing lots of maths experiments in the week long Maths Circus his teachers held in class last week. He loved doing all the counting and weighing and measuring, and says maths is his favourite thing at school hurrah (his fave thing in class at school, obv playing with his friends in the playground is his main motivation for turning up every day)

happiness complete(-er)

To make things completely perfect I've now got one of those doo-dads from maplin that looks like a tape and means you can play your mp3 player on your old car stereo. Hurrah for no more having to burn mp3s to cd then tape them in order to have choons on the move.

PS BB7 starts tonight, I may be gone some time ...

in love

OK so it's not quite as small or slim or pretty as an ipod. But it's got a much bigger memory, and brains always beats looks in the end. I totally adore it. The only thing I didn't like was the earphones. It is so double plus ungood to have white headphones on a not-ipod mp3 player. Plus they didn't sit nicely in my ears, and had quite poor reviews for sound quality. But with my trusty sony earphones, the sound is beautiful (and doesn't leak much hurrah). And to make my happiness complete I got a cable so I can play it through the stereo. This bout of consumerism has made me a happy bunny. So what if I go deaf in 10 years time?

here comes the summer

Poor balcony, it has been much neglected since I stopped smoking and so no longer sit out on it every day in all weathers. However, a few days of sunshine has finally shamed me into doing something about it. We chucked out the mouldering peat free gro-bags, dried up empty pots and assorted weeds, and planted some nice new pots. It doesn't quite look like this picture yet (this is from 3 years ago) but hopefully it will be looking nice soon, and we'll even have some homegrown produce (just in time for us to go away for a few weeks and it all to get parched when the neighbours forget to water it while we're gone). I even got a hanging basket and some flowers for outside the front door. Just watch it stop being sunny now ...

coming over all cultural

last night we all went to the theatre, for what I think is O's first time seeing a real play in a real theatre (I don't know how that happened, that we've never been before, must make sure to look out for kid friendly plays to take him to in future). We went to see the fabulous Skid 180, written by our fabulous friend & neighbour. It was really impressive. The words are brilliant, the production is excellent and the on-stage bmx-ing is stunning. Go see it if you're get a chance, in Manchester or Australia. Several of our neighbours were at the show last night too, so O is now out on his bike, playing 'Skid 180' with his mates who've seen it too.

oooh I'm so 'cited

I've been thinking for a while that I must enter the century of the fruitbat and get one of these newfangled mp3 players, and almost bought an el cheapo one t'other day. Now some kind person has given me some £££ which they insist I spend upon myself and their £££ together with my existing ££ may add up to ipod £££ whoo. I'm thinking of getting a 4gb ipod nano. Anyone got one, are they as good as the hype? Or should I maybe go for a non-appley one? Even tho they look so kewl and sleek and mmmmmm

edit: I'm tempted by the Creative Zen 8 gig model now ... slightly less good looking maybe but twice as much gigs and good reviews ... decisions decisions

making your own fun

So, I was googling to see if there was anything on t'interweb yet about the bmx dirt jumps mounds track thingy the local bike punks have been building near our house¹ (they have made a fab job of it, and are also trying to teach the local scrotes some skills and some manners if they want to use it too, so no doubt the council will come round and flatten their unofficial fun boo), and inadvertantly discovered a local car park is a prime d0gg1ng location. Ewwww. But then in the process of finding the explanatory linkage, searching bbc news for d0gg1ng found the news that K9 is getting his own series hurrah although this is going to provoke several months of 'when's the K9 show on?' then several more of 'but why haven't we got jetix on our tv?'. Boo.



1) please insert correct young persons' vernacular, but you get the idea.

so how was your day?

This is how O says his was:

"a shiny rainbow star, all colours of the rainbow"

And what makes a shiny rainbow star of a day? A 2 mile 'walk' in Grin Low Woods on a slightly damp day, in which he and his best friend climbed trees, looked for bugs, played with sticks, explored Gruffalo caves, ate jam sarnies and moaned about being cold; sleep on the way back in the car; get home and play cars with best friend for another couple of hours; have ice-cream for pudding. Hurrah for shiny rainbow days.

big boys do cry

Poor O was emotionally drained by tonight's Dr Who. He was alternately delighted to see K9, terrified of the BatPeople, devastated when K9 was destroyed, and finally choked with tears when K9 reappeared right at the end. Followed by rummaging in the toybox to find Teksta. Awwww.

disappointed

I know I shouldn't be surprised or even care about this, but I can't help being yet another person who'd burn my White Stripes records if I had any (threatening to delete my mp3s doesn't have the same ring). Bill Hicks put it best:

Do a commercial, you're off the artistic roll call, every word you say is suspect, you're a corporate whore and eh, end of story.

talking of procrastinating ...

... today I finished my first Gruaniad hard sudoku puzzle hurrah

you talking to me?

I found an interesting article while surfing instead of reconfiguring investment strategy. It all sounds very familiar:

Procrastination is not just an issue of time management or laziness. It's about feeling paralyzed and guilty as you channel surf, knowing you should be cracking the books or reconfiguring your investment strategy. ...

"The main reason people procrastinate is fear," says Neil Fiore, Ph.D.. ... "Procrastinators fear they'll fall short because they don't have the requisite talent or skills. "They get overwhelmed and they're afraid they'll look stupid." ...

Children of authoritarian parents are prone to procrastinate. Pychyl speculates that children with such parents postpone choices because their decisions are so frequently criticized--or made for them. Alternatively, the child may procrastinate as a form of rebellion. Refusing to study can be an angry--if self-defeating--message to Mom and Dad. ...

Several symptoms of depression feed procrastination. Decision-making is another problem. Because depressed people can't feel much pleasure, all options seem equally bleak, which makes getting started difficult and pointless.

I looked in vain for the second page telling you how to stop being a procrastinator :-(

hurrah for t'internet

everyone to whom I am related and most people with whom I work now think I am a World Expert on all things computerish. Little do they realise the Seekrit of My Awesome Geek Power comes down to 3 things

• RTFM
• push all the buttons just to see what happens
• if you don't know, google knows someone who does

Thus when R shamefacedly confessed to jamming the cd drive, I fixed it armed only with an unbent paper clip

More fun with paperclips:

• history of
• art with
• uses for

climb every mountain

well, for certain values of 'climb' and 'mountain', where 'mountain' = 'west pennine moor' and 'climb' = 'drive up to the top of hill and then walk along on the flat'. Took us over 2 hours to go 3 miles around Blackstone Edge but it was fun. O brought B along with him (for O, anything experience is better if he can bring a friend) and they ran about getting muddy in peat bogs and climbing up embankments and generally having fun. Next weekend we're visting the Nine Ladies (weather permitting).

Now I should be devoting myself to curly arrows but have distracted myself with the aid of wine and sing-a-long-a-Bill on the headphones. I really must remember not to listen to music I really like while working.

as if that wasn't enought ...

... woke up this morning to find some little scrotey b@st@rds had tried to break into my car and knackered up the door in the process. So that's going to cost me £200 and also cost me a morning sorting out it out (and another morning or two next week dealing with the garage, tho luckily garageman = very nice man so that's not too stressful). A morning I should've spent trying to get to grips with kinetics again. I read this stuff and I understand all the words but I don't understand what it means. We have a day school tomorrow, which is good, but I'd get so much more out of it if I had a grasp of the stuff already. Which I now have this afternoon and this evening to do. But this afternoon I have to work and this evening O has a friend sleeping over aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh I want to cry

panic stations

Today I've been to that London & back. Tomorrow I've got to get up early again and go to sunny Brummie¹ to work, so tonight I have to get ready for that, so my studying is falling behind again, so my house is a tip, so I am panicking and fretting that I won't get everything I need to do done, so I am worrying instead of working, so I am eating to quell my fears. So this is my life pattern. I know I need to change it, but it won't be today.


1. noisy but highly recommended: Bostin' Birmingham

if at first you don't succeed

A couple of years ago we decided to go on regular family walks. This decision was reversed after several miserable afternoons spent coaxing and bullying a whining whinging O for a couple of miles in the great outdoors. But today being Easter, I decided we all needed to go and find a big hill to roll our eggs down, so we headed up to Darwen Tower. O loved it and wants to walk up more big hills hurrah! Edale here we come.

R & O are going out to eat later, I'd love to go too but the books need me. So I will stay in with just kinetics and my one little easter egg (from my mum) for company. I will not be distracted by the temptation to play with my new magnetic sudoku game (easter pressie from R in lieu of choc). I love these magnetic games, much fun has been had in tents with their little tins of ludo and snakes & ladders.

PS

just like my house, my car, my life, this blog badly needs a spring clean. It may make a good assignment avoidance activity in a few weeks' time ...

today I have been mostly

buying books. I :heart: charity shops¹, this morning I got a big pile of books for under a tenner. 4 assorted 'young puffins' and a Dennis and Gnasher 'Gnock Gnock' book for O - the only book he reads voluntarily at the moment is his Horrid Henry joke book, hopefully the Dennis book will be as popular. I am determined to get him reading by any means necessary. I also got '101 Cool Science Experiments' (for me and O) and 'How to get a good degree' (hopefully it'll tell me how to stop using reading study skills materials as a diversion from actually studying);


demonstrating against the destitution, detention and deportation of refugees, asylum seekers & migrants;




calming a 6 year old boy who has been waiting for the new series of Dr Who since Christmas and is in danger of bursting with exctitment within the next 2 hours (or alternatively of getting burst eardrums from me shouting "NO!" when asked for the 125th time if it's time for Dr Who yet). I am looking forward to it too, although the 10th Dr isn't a patch on the 9th


studying chemical kinetics - if the Dr is ever looking for a new assistant, I want to be ready


1. that may be'thrift store' to you

I want to believe

Watched "The Manchester Passion" this evening - an updated passion play set in Manchester, with a Madchester soundtrack. It was quite good, despite the involvement of Keith Allen (also I thought they were going to mime to the original songs, which would've been betterer IMO). In fact it was even a bit moving, made a bit of me want that kind of security of a faith again. But a bigger bit of me remains a rationalist and an atheist.


this week's feeble excuse for postlessness: I made a critical error by 'just having a go' at a sudoku puzzle. Now I am hooked. It is the opium of the geeks.

this week's feeble excuse for poor eating choices: [insert here]

I am

You Are Barney

You could have been an intellectual leader... Instead, your whole life is an homage to beer You will be remembered for: your beautiful singing voice and your burps Your life philosophy: "There's nothing like beer to give you that inflated sense of self-esteem."

The Simpsons Personality Test

Simpsons Personality Test, via this weeks New Favourite Blog. It's not very accurate, tho. I am well known for having a terrible singing voice.

want that one!

A geologist's tricorder!
I will settle for nothing less for Mother's Day (a day which I will be celebrating by leaving my child with my mother while I go on a field trip hah)

happy christmas

Last night we went to a Christmas party. My neighbour L hasn't seen her son since November. Her ex (who has residence) decided she wanted to play happy families with her new partner, so she moved 25 miles away and wouldn't let L see their son anymore - and they used to have shared care! It had to go to court but at last L has a court order giving her contact, starting this weekend. Because she didn't see her son at Christmas she decided to do Christmas now, to give him him his pressies and see his friends and family. It was one of the best Christmas parties I've been to. Why the feck do some people use their kids like that?

It's been half-term this week so we have been busy busy busy. This week O has been ice-skating, swimming 3 times, to the park twice, to the museum, to the cinema, to Pizza Hut and had two sleep-overs. Back to school and back to normal next week.

As it's just been Xmas I will make a new resolution - be a better blogger x

roses are red, violets are blue

thanks to meish.org for their rather wonderful anti-VD messages, of which this is just one

I am old (official)

Being an OU student means I can use the local university library, so I used my day off today to go and study there. Studying in the library works well for me, as I can't eat in there nor can I use their t'internet, so I am forced to look at my books instead. However it does mean I have to be around large numbers of young people. And their mobile phones.

They use their phones in the library (letting them ring and then holding loud conversations), they use them while they're on the loo, they hold a loud conversation on them in the cafe about how their alcholic mum has gone back on the game.

As I heard someone say on the wireless yesterday, the worst thing about Young People Today is that they make you feel like your parents, moaning on about Young People Today.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Manchester a Young Person is blogging about the fat old witch giving him evils in the library today.

3 years

I have not smoked for three years, 8 hours, 33 minutes
27408 cigarettes not smoked
£6,852.23 saved to spend on books instead of paid to evil death dealing tobacco companies
Life saved to spend with new books: 13 weeks, 4 days, 4 hours, 0 minutes.

where did she go?

When I was in London last week, I used a tube station I haven't been to for years. Took me back to how I was then, and who I was waiting for - the person I thought was the Love of My Life. Actually, he probably was and a little corner of my heart will always belong to him, but he was never interested in me, when I got up all my courage and asked him out I got the 'like you as a friend' routine.

But the main thing I remember is how scared I was. Back then I think I was scared of everything, scared all the time. I know I still get scared of things now, but I'm not scared of my whole life, like I was back then.

So it got me thinking about my life, and the way everything's turned out. And so did going back to studying chemistry. I feel a little silly and a little regretful that I didn't learn this stuff properly when I had the chance, the first time round at university. But then I think, if I'd've stayed and got my degree and got a job and a mortgage and a husband, I'd be going quietly insane in some suburban hell.

Instead I got thrown out of university, had a twisty turny life path, met some fantastic people, learnt a whole load of stuff, go policitics, and most importantly I got R & O. So now I go noisily insane in cyberspace bwahaaahahahahahah.

poor little boy

Aww, my poor O. He's had a temperature and been vomitting, and spent the day in bed. He got up for a bit this evening to watch the wildlife programmes, one about elephants and one about Ants.

Then I put him back to bed, but he woke up an hour later, feverish and raving about the ants in his bedroom. Awww.

my week

Finished my maths course, started my chemistry course, had a cold, looked after O with a cold, lost 2 lb, fell in love with green tea

lycra & sadness

First real bike ride in ages today, and it wasn't very long. 10 mile round trip to visit CB, whose bad knee is still stopping her cycling. Wore a black armband in memory of the four North Wales cyclists killed while out on a club ride last week.

Have started back at FatClub - going to a different meeting as my last leader was pretty bobbins really. I hate having to go to FatClub (and pay for it!) but I think it's the only way I can keep focussed on weight loss. My stats might make a reappearance in the side bar soon, also I need to spring clean my blog roll.

back(ish)

Happy New Year. Back home from Ireland, back to work, back to fat club. I reckon, last year I did the excercise thing, the year before I did the eating thing, maybe this year is the year I can get them both going. Oh and work on the bingeing thing too. But don't know how much blogging there will be for a while, am busy with trying to fit it all in, plus work, study and obssess about Celebrity Big Brother. Some kind of service will be restored sometime.

happy solstice

Sorry for lack of recent blogging. We're off on our Xmas travels tomorrow, to the wifi-less wilds of Ireland. Normal service will be resumed next year (maybe even with weight loss efforts included woo).



Big festive greetings and respect to U.S. District Judge John E. Jones III and the Dover parents.

[O]ur conclusion today is that it is unconstitutional to teach I[ntelligent] D[esign] as an alternative to evolution in a public school science classroom ...

We find that the secular purposes claimed by the board amount to a pretext for the board's real purpose, which was to promote religion

They're partying over at Creation Watch (you can even download the whole trial transcript as a pdf - could come in useful as gift wrap for any ID-ers you know).

owl cat

I may have mentioned how much I hate my menstrual cycle. Now my PMS has come back with a vengeance, and I have spent much of the past week as an utter loon. How can it be fair that I have to have this on top of already being a nutcase? Not feckin fare. Nor is it fare that my already vast body feels like it is swollen to twice normal size at the same time. Life's a bitch and then you die, eh girls?

Add to that crap eating and no excercise and you have a recipe for me feeling at my worst. I am not eating anything approaching normally. I am working on eating 3 meals a day, with the content of those meals a secondary consideration, but even that is eluding me most days. Tomorrow morning I will eat a normal breakfast. Not much of an aim but a start.

Oh and I'm always tired, and have light headed spells, despite going to bed early most nights. Bah.

Other stuff:

We had fab time when Trin visited, her and her girls are stars. O is in love with Danz all over again.

O is arty as an arty thing right now, drawing all the time. An owl cat is but one of his latest creations.

Went to belly dance party and bought myself the most gorgeous coin belt. It was money I shouldn't've spent this close to Christmas, but I couldn't resist. It's my favourite colours (purple) with masses of silver coins, and is heavy, and makes a lovely sound.

Am still doing maths for loonies, currently on Fun With Triangles wooo.

Will blog more soon.

that's Christmas sorted then

Got O's Big Present today. I'd got him something else, ages ago, but he wrote his Santa List at the weekend and it seems he has his heart set on Texter the Robotic Puppy. I'd never heard of it, I thought perhaps it was some kind of txting dog thing but a google for 'robotic puppy' reveals the thing's called 'Teksta' and available in Woolies for 30 of our English pounds. So now it's safely stashed in the back of the filing cabinet, along with his other pressies. Most of which are from ebay or TK Maxx. The Chocolate Orange is probably the only one that's new and not last season's. Meanwhile my poor parents have spent all day looking for the "Shark Boy and Lava Girl" DVD for him. They wanted to get him a DVD and asked me what he'd like, I said that one cos he loved it at the cinema and his friend has the DVD, so I knew it was available. So mum and dad have ShopYouths in every dvd shop in their town looking for it, before finding out it's not been released in the UK yet. Oops.

Now I just have to think of something for R's birthday. It's not fair, our anniversary, his birthday and Christmas all happen within a month of each other. Anniversary pressie I have already. Christmas is easy because we've already decided we don't want presents. Well we do, obv (I personally would love an ipod and a nice shiney new bike) but the peeps in Kashmir probably needs tents more, so we've agreed on donations instead of presents this year. Everyone else is getting books or Lush things or something from the Oxfam catalogue (unless we guilt trip them into the Kashmir thing too bwahahahahaha).

Other news: Trin and girls are coming this weekend hurrah! I hope they get here thro the wind and snow eep. Mr Branson's trains not like snow. Better pack wooly hats, a shovel and a hip flask, just in case.

acceptable face of capitalism

I am supposed to have 0 money. I do have some money but the Inland Revenue quite unreasonably expect me to give it to them soon. Bah. So I'm not supposed to be spending anything (much). Plus I'm up to here with rampant consumerism and there's still 6 weeks to go till Xmas. But today I had an anti-consumerist shopping spree. Went to The Basement for vegan-but-nice lunch and while I was there, got myself some fair trade footwear. Then on to Oxfam books and another few quid spent on lovely lovely books mmmmm books hurrah.

Haven't told Trin yet that it's Buy Nothing Day next Saturday!

Here is an extract Jack and the Bean Stalk by O:


The beans grew and grew. Jack was shocked.

I :heart: sums

I am finding this maths short course worryingly interesting. There is something nice and soothing about manipulating the numbers and watching the answer come out. I'm currently loving algebra.

Be prewarned, I am almost certainly in my maths comfort zone and this time next week I will be tearing my hair out and throwing books around the house and ranting about how stoopid it all is.

come the glorious day

Manchester is over run with, infested with, plagued with, luxury flat developments. You'd think there'd be a limited on the number of feckwits with too much money who could afford urbane urban sophisticate open plan beech and chrome palaces in the sky but no. The skyline is still as full of cranes and scaffolding as ever, ever corner you turn you see old buildings being converted or new buildings going up, to provide more flats for yuppy wankers and more trendy bars for them to drink in. The BBC's northward relocation is going to make things worse. But of all of them, if I get to chose one to be the first to be blown up come the revolution, it will be this one:



This is 'The Hacienda', built on the site of the old Hacienda and marketed with the phrase that triggered a screaming rage everytime I cycled past it "The party's over. Now you can come home". Walking past it yesterday morning, as we walked along the canal into town, I read on the back of it a timeline of the Hac, and then the famous quote "That's all over. You'll never see the hacienda. It doesn't exist. The hacienda must be built".

Now, I wasn't much of a raver even when I were a lass and I only went to the Hac a few times. And I firmly believe Anthony H Wilson is an agent of Satan. But that's not really the point. What I hate is the way the city is being airbrushed and glossed over, everything sleek and clean and airbrushed and corporate. Stop homogenising my world!

Oh and I bet few of the wankers who live there know that where quote comes from, or have ever heard of situationism.

Rant over, back to work.

P.S. Freedom for Tooting!

you know you live in the big city when ...

... you're watching Britain's Toughest Towns and it shows Donal driving past your house.

And you know you live in a real community when you take your kids* swimming and meet neighbours and kids from school and staff from school at the pool, and the lifeguards are kind and friendly to the kids, and the people in the papershop when you stop to get a paper on the way home know you won't be buying sweets cos Friday is the kids' sweets day and you have lunch in the local cafe and the kids interupt your neighbour's late lunch with his new girlf by telling them bad jokes. And you think, for all its problems, living round here is way better than alot of other places.



* I still only have one, but we took B along with us

quick update

sorry peeps, been busy busy. O was 6 on Friday, we had his party on Friday after school. 15 very loud and very lively kids, it was fun but knackering. First thing Saturday me and O drove up to Durham to visit my best friend C for her birthday (R had to stay home and work awww). Our friend M (lovely man) was there too. Saturday as Bommie Night, Sunday we all went to Marsden Bay. I admired the lovely rocks, O insisted on stripping off and jumping about in the sea. The North Sea. In November. I know we are having an unseaonally warm autumn but it was still mad. He warmed up with hot chocolate in the grotto where we had lunch. Then the long drive home. Only the amount I love and miss C could get me to drive up and down the A1 in a weekend. I hate that road. Back home Sunday night and now started on my maths course hurrah (sort of).

I am vastly proud of O right now. Last week he got two gold star awards for good work at school. On Saturday he managed to see most of a fireworks display - for the past 3 years he has been terrified of fireworks. And as soon as he heard we were going to the beach he was determined to go in the water - this time last year he was terrified of the sea, too, and became hysterical when taken anywhere near it. Now he's a complete water baby. I love my little (not so little now he's 6!) boy.

Eid Mubarak

Thinking of everyone marking Eid ul Fitr in Kashmir this year.

note to self:

I am an old married lady. I must not attempt to flirt with the Nice Young Man who works in the cafe. Even if he did wink at me over the falafel.

Festival of Lights

Subh Diwali!

return of the curse

The doctor said I had to have my lovely IUS taken out cos its 5 years was up. After 5 blissful period free years, the reality of the return my real menstrual cycle is coming as a bit of a shock. Where did I put those white trousers, I need to go roller skating.

trickle treat

3 things you need for a happy halloween:


Our pumpkin








my O in his skelington suit








Pumpkin soup a la Nigel Slater

rainy day women

It was hard to get out of bed this morning, even with the extra hour From under my lovely warm duvet I could hear it was wet and windy outside. Cyling 35+ miles in it was not an attractive idea. I nearly rang CB to say I wasn't going, but I did go. We modified our ride down to 25 (less exposed) miles and even fitted in a bit of shopping - I got a BananaGuard^TM at last. No more squashed nanas, hurrah! And even tho the morning was wet and nasty, the afternoon was lovely and sunny.

Came home earlier than expected, to find R had forgotten all about the local Apple & Pumpkin Party, so I took O to the end of it and he got to carve his own pumpkin for tomorrow night. It's party party party all week next week - B is having a halloween/late birthday party tomorrow, then it's O's turn on Friday, then we're off to spend the weekend with C for her birthday.

today's 2 things:

• went out cycling in spite of the weather
• have eaten reasonably all day (no bingeing)

something new(ish)

A few years ago I saw a psychologist for a course of cognitive behavioural therapy. A big part of CBT is working challenge and re-setting your automatic thoughts, the ones that tell you you're bad, rubbish, don't deserve nice things, everybody hates you, etc etc. At my last appointment, the psychologist recommended some things I should do to carry on working on my automatic thoughts. One thing was, at the end of every day, write down at least two things I had done that day that I could be pleased with, that I could praise myself for doing. I haven't done it for a while but I've been feeling a bit cr@p lately so I'm going to try and start the habit again.

today's 2 things:

• took O out to the park for a couple of hours, rather than staying in lazying about all day
• I did not smoke today
  

normal service

sorry 'bout the whisky-fuelled pity party last night, and thanks for the comments. I don't hate myself but I do hate quite a lot of bits of my body. I haven't the energy for a big push yet, I don't think, but I will try for a series of small nudges. Starting tomorrow once I've digested this curry ...

Hello Helen (your Manchester-based student librarians can learn the essential moves at these classes) and Fox (haven't been to Enniskillen for years)

I hate adverts. T-mobile, I vow to never buy anything from you ever, you Undertones defilers you. Also curses on whichever other mobile sellers are using the intro to "I fought the law" in their ads. I've just set up my phone to play that when R rings (everyone else is Barwick Green).` Now it sounds like I'm a crazy-frog-alike, to kids who don't even know what the song is or who did it. Gah.

Never mind, there's always gawping in awe at Google Earth to take my mind off it.

I'm fat

Me and O are visiting my parents for a few days. I have been avoiding looking in their full length mirrors. I "forgot" my swimming costume so I didn't have to go swimming with O and them. I have to admit to myself, I hate the feeling of my gut sagging over my thighs. I have to admit I'm fat and I don't like and I don't like myself. I have to get back to the weight loss cr@p. I hate it but I have to. I hate this.

I think I hate myself.

bright lights, big city

part 1 ...


Went to That London yesterday - meeting in the morning but afternoon free hurrah. So of course I went to the NHM to look at rocks. And discovered that the aces thing about having a picture phone is that you can send you friends sms-postcards of interesting things wot you have seen.


Sadly Mr Grumblemag was too busy to meet up, so I had to make my own fun after the museum closed. No problem there tho, proceed directly to Diwana and eat fab curry (well, once they had remembered about my order). It serves gorgeous south Indian vegetarian food, the bel poori and dhosas are amazing. I love the north Indian/Punjabi style of curry you get in most curry houses, but having a different style of curry is a nice change.

part 2 ...

Had to go into Mancunium today, to change my mobile phone. Again¹. Spent another hour or so in the Orange Shop. 3rd time lucky, I hope. Town was pretty horrible. A new section of the Arndale Centre has opened, featuring the World's Biggest Next and an enormous Starfucks. Ick. Had to go take O to hang out with the kewl kids to get away from the hideous corporateness. Turns out the City Council don't like them hanging around making the place look untidy, tho.



1. I love it, but both the ones I've had so far have gone weird on me

part-time mother

Poor R and O, I have abandoned them this weekend.

Saturday was cycling day. 35 mainly flat miles, stopping for lunch at Tatton. It was a fairly sedate pace, even by our standards, as the peloton included a 76 yr old on a 3-gear shopper. And good on her, I hope when I'm 76 I'm still up to cycling that far. On the way back home after the ride I managed a fairly spectacular fall, doing minor damage to bike and self, and in the process finally laying to rest any ill-conceived thoughts of cycling to Alderley Edge.

So I drove there this morning instead, for my first OUGS field trip. It was brilliant. Meet new people, learn new things, look at rocks and crawl around in the dark 25 metres under ground, a perfect day out.

We went down the mine in the morning. I've been down mines & caves before but only on the 'school trip' kind, with big well lit tunnels. These mines weren't like that. The only light was from the lamps on our helmets, we had to crouch and crawl in some places and even go flat out SAS-stylee at one point. Lots of interesting geology and history and mine facts. Two hours of that (not long enough!), break for toasties and cakes a the Wizard tea rooms, then on to an overground geological tour of the Edge, which was also v. interesting. Came home hungry, tired, muddy, sand and mud all down my front, and very happy. Oh, and inspired to re-read Alan Garner.

Next weekend is planned already. Sunday is cycling, but Saturday O is making me take him to the visiting exhibition at the Science Museum. Bogies!

you know you spend too much time thinking about bikes when ...

... you have a very naughty dream featuring the man from the bikeshop. I shall never be able to look him in the eye while discussing lube and nipples again.

I love this

OK so I got it from bad Popbitch that I was slagging off the other day. But anyway, the Gallery of Bellydancing Librarians is competely wonderful. My next projec may have to be the Gallery of Bellydancing Geologists.

new friends

A geology blog. And another one. And one over there, too. I'm all 'cited about geology today (even more than usual) cos I got a place on a trip down a mine at the weekend. Hurrah. Now I'm off to play with my new toy.

hide the screwdrivers

Took the side off of the computer this afternoon. The drop of oil worked a treat, and I gave it a good clean whiel I was in there. Puter is lovely and quiet again, and everything seems to still be working fine. This messing around inside your computer could get addictive. Fortunately, mine lives in a cupboard under my desk so I shan't be tempted to get a clear case so I can watch it work. One of these days I'll built my own new puter, tho, and maybe incorporate an aquarium or hamster hotel.

Another thing that's addictive is buying things for my lovely new phone. Apparantly I can buy a bit of software that'll mean I can have my Outlook diary on my phone! Whooo, where did I put my credit card ...

teenage dirtbag babysitter

So, tonight we're off out to the El Salvador benefit, leaving O in the hands of a neighbouring 16 year old. J keeps his head covered at all times - the one time I saw him without a beanie or hoodie on, I didn't recognize him. He is trying manfully to grow a facial hair feature but it's a bit too bumfluff yet. He looks like the kind of youth the Daily Mail warn you about, and he is an extremely nice young man. Did well in his GCSEs¹, just started college, wants to go to university. Is nice to the little kids, even plays with them sometimes. Is of course O's all time hero, who makes him want to be a dude.

So I am not worried about leaving O with him (plus I know he has babysitting experience, and his mum will be at home a few doors away). I'm just worried about what provisions to supply. My mum always laid out a tray with snacks etc for the babysitter. I'm not going that far, but as I can't get in wine like I do for grown up babysitters (much as I'm sure he'd like it!) I txt Trin for advice on what to feed teens. Apparently their staple diet is coke, dorritos and jaffa cakes, so I'm off out to Asda to stock up.

J looks like he spends his weekends hanging out with in Cathedral Gardens. I hope he does, it's goth-sk8r-mosh² heaven (Abby needs to go there, as soon as she's finished in Afflecks [noisy link] - it's like a walking advert for Afflecks). They all dress up like freaks (or is that phreaks?²) and hang out. Yay. I would a hundred times rather O grew up like that (whatever the version is of it in 10 years time), with some spark of individuality, than some anodyne top-40-listening, topman-wearing, consumerist, trafford-centre-hanging-outer, kind of teen.


1. Showing my age there, nearly typed O-levels
2. Excuse any inappropriate use of teenage vernacular, but you get the idea

one for trin

The ChavTest¹, question 38:
Have you or has anyone you know got an outdoor hot tub?

I do hate the word 'chav', it's so feckin snobby, all that popbitch laffing at the oiks crap. But then again, there are some people who are .. just ... I mean, they are shopping in Primark at 11 o'clock on a Monday morning with their kids. Madam, seriously, Chantelle, Chardonay and little Kyle should be at school, not having you screaming at them while shopping for poor-quality leisure wear.

1. my result:
You are 18 % chav
You clearly know you are not, nor will you ever be anything even closely resembling a bonafide chav but that doesn't stop you from jumping on the bling bandwagon every now and then. There's nothing wrong with a bit of pretending though you'll never be able to hold your own with the true Burberry brigade.

close to home

Earlier in the week, I arranged to call in and see my friend A today. When I got there everyone was glued to BBC News 24 for news of the south Asian earthquake. I've never seen so many phones in one place, outside of a phone shop, as I saw there today. A's landline, her mobile, her son and daughter's mobiles, her son-in-law and daughter-in-law's mobiles, all lined up on the coffee table. A is from Kashmir, as are her son- and daughter-in-law. They have family and friends there, so many people they are so worried about. Some they've heard some and some not. So they're waiting and worrying and hoping.

Meanwhile my neighbour, who is from El Salvador, is organising a benefit night on Tuesday in aid of those affected by natural disasters there, the volcano and the hurricane. Hopefully we'll get a babysitter so R & I can both go - I can't remember the last time we went out together without O.

Techno news:

1. fed up of my mobile's battery not staying charged for longer than 30 minutes, I went and bought a new phone. The first 'proper' (ie not off the man on the market) phone I've ever bought. Wooo. It had to be clam shell, natch. Beam me up Scotty and I'll change those laws of physics. At least I will when I've been back to the shop to sort it out cos one of the menus has stopped working and also, despite Trin's best efforts, I can't get picture messaging to work boo.
   
   
2. feckin' ZoneAlarm. Since I installed the latest updates, neither of our puters work properly with t'interweb (Firefox cannot get online at all, so I am reduced to reverting to IE. I miss my tabs!) Turns out I am not alone in this. Happy few hours to be spend uninstalling and then installing an earlier version. Joy. And no I haven't sorted the fan business out yet. Nor have I taken my bike to have the broken spoke fixed, either.

ho ho hmmm

Only 80 days to go! FFS. Bah humbug mutter moan etc. However, for the first time in my entire life, I have actually started thinking ahead about Xmas. Oh yes, Santa's been to Ebay - so far I've won auctions for a pair of walkie-talkies, a kid's City shirt and a good-as-new Junior Monopoly set. I also have my eye on Pokemon games for his gameboy colour and some other bits and pieces. Actually, I probably need to cut down on the ebaying, I'm becoming slightly obsessed. But I have had some top bargains, incl. clothes for me. And O is growing out of his bed, so I have my eye on a couple of auctions for 'high sleepers'.

I didn't get around to fixing the puter in the end. In fact I didn't get round to doing anything much. I was struck by some kind of Lurgy and spent much of Wednesday and Thursday sleeping. Still not feeling 100% today but have to get some work done, then am looking after friend's son later. I'm a bit worried about him, I think he's a bit backward. Nearly 3, and doesn't know his Percy from his Oliver! Fortunately, O is having a mini Sodor-relapse and so will be able to give him some intenstive coaching before he goes back into rehab.

In other news: My Son, The Next Jamie Oliver:

1. At my parents' do, O happily ate cabbage and carrots. When I suggested he have some green beans cos he usually likes them, he said no because he'd already tried them and they didn't taste of anything much. Assembled aunties and uncles were astonished! "Our grandchildren will only eat chicken nuggets!" etc etc.
   
2. We went out for lunch on Saturday, O insisted on ordering the Skelington Fish (Grilled Trout) he'd seen R have before. 5 year old child eats trout shocker! Even if he did insist on playing with the poor dead fish's skeleton first.

OK, I know I'm being a bit smug here and quite a lot of it is luck. He's a generally well behaved child, and is not particularly fussy (unlike his mother *blush*). But there must be an element of "If you feed 'em chicken nuggets, that's what they'll eat" to it, too. Where did this idea come from, that children need special food of their own and can't possibly be expected to eat real, normal food?

And finally, top xmas shopping tip: TK Maxx have ace tins of ammaretti-type biscuits in now. The tins are v nice and decorative. Ideal pressies for aunties and such.

ooh lookie

As an engineer's daughter I should've known, you can fix anything with a drop of oil, although apparantly squirting the Sacred Spray around your puter is not recommended (Dad, put that can down right now!). *Wonders if bike chain oil will do the trick ...* Failing that, there's always the trusty Brummie Screwdriver.

I may be gone some time

Eep my puter is making horrible noises and sounds like it's about to blow up. I think it's probably the fan, so I'm gonna replace it this afternoon when I finish work. Mind you, I have no idea what kind of fan I need. Are they much of a muchness or do I need to get the right kind of fan for my CPU? Plan for today is:

• Make backups
• Go to puter shop
• Find screwdriver
• Wreck Fix my puter

S, if I fall off on t'interweb for a while, you'll know why.

Other news: Life Imitates Art: Turn it up to 11, Mick

afternoon off

My course is finished. I of course left finishing the final assignment to the last possible minute, ended up staying up most of Friday night, but got it in the post on time on Saturday morning. I think, I hope, I've done enough to pass. One year down, four more to go. My next course starts in February, so I'll have a few months off. Or at least, I will if I don't sign up to do Maths for Loonies Science over the winter.

When I came back from the Post Office on Saturday, it was a weird feeling to think I had no more studying to do. I spent the afternoon lying on the settee reading, completely guilt-free, no nagging thoughts that I should be doing something else. Sunday was bike ride day (33 miles, very flat and easy going). Today I am getting my tax return sorted out.

Once I have no study stress and no tax-return stress, I'll have no need to keep comfort eating and will be able to concentrate on getting back on the path of d**t righteousness. Won't I?

how does it feel?

You used to be so amused
At Napoleon in rags and the language that he used
Go to him now, he calls you, you can't refuse
When you got nothing, you got nothing to lose
You're invisible now, you got no secrets to conceal.

Someone I know, in a friend-of-a-friend kind of way, got evicted from her house today. She's a smackhead, her kid's in care, her life's a complete feckin mess. Today I am grateful that however fecked up I might feel my life is, I've been able to hang on and not sink into that kind of horrid pit.

Yes I have been transfixed by No Direction Home. And so should you. If you've missed it, watch it at the next available opportunity. Then listen to his music. Every day. If by some oversigght you do not already own (and/or are not word-perfect on) the complete works of Bobby Zimmerman, what are you playing at? Go get those records now!

And it makes a change from Megablocks Dragons.

randomness

Sorry for lack of posting, been all busy, what with study and work and shopping. Gah I hate shopping but it had to be done, for to look all lovely at Mum & Dad's meal tomorrow (thanks for the advice on that btw). But here is some random stuff to be going on with ...

• Children's names 'spell trouble'
  All that agonizing over baby names that first time parents do, turns out not to be a waste of time

• World's Thickest Man in "Who's the daddy?" shocker
  Emma finally tells Ed that Will (his brother and her husband) is not the father of her baby - Ed is. Shock horror omg etc. FFS, how is Ed supposed not have noticed that this woman, the love of his life, who shagged him on her hen night then still married his brother, gave birth 9 months after their tryst? Ed may be a Grundy, and may not be the sharpest tool in the box even by Grundy standards, but he wouldn't even need to use all of his fingers to count to 9. And he's a stockman/farmer type, cows and humans have the same gestation period (true fact), it wouldn't've taken much for him to work it out. Or even to just wonder, just a little teeny bit. Anyway, it's poor ClarrieLuv I feel sorry for.

• Come gather 'round the tv, people
  for tis Bob Dylan season on the BBC. I was wandering round town this morning with Tangled Up In Blue playing in my head, and when I walked into Oddbins it was playing in the shop. I took this as a sign from His Noodliness that I should stock up. Which reminds me to mention that I have been .....

• Touched By His Noodly Appendage
  

help needed

Next week it's my parents' ruby wedding anniversary, so they're having A Bit Of A Do. The question is, should I (and/or my sister) make some kind of speech? Our family doesn't go in for big gestures, speeches, being demonstrative, etc. I was thinking maybe just proposing a toast to them might be the thing to do? Feck, I hate that I am nearing 40 and still have no idea how to behave in public. Nor any idea what to wear (I am about to go and throw myself at the shops and hope something vaguely suitable sticks).

Blog of the day: BadScience. I :heart: Ben "serious fuck-off academic ninja" Goldacre.

in the big city ....

... you go to pick your child up from school and find the road closed by the police because someone's just been shot. Feck.

today's 'to do' list

1. Finish assigment
2. Talk to O's teacher about how hard he is finding the move from Reception (skool-lite) to Year 1 (skool-proper) - so much so that he claimed to be too sick to go yesterday and this morning was crying and wailing about how he wants to 'quit school'
3. Watch 2nd episode of Nighty Night
4. Return a stack of emails
5. Type up some minutes
6. Write a report for work
7. Draw bootiful flowchart for above report for extra brownie points
8. Stop going over and over what happened yesterday with the neighbours
9. Stop ebaying for new clothes as a diversion from all of the above
   

bah

bah! 1: Ingurland win Ashes

bah! 2: just had stand-up row with neighbours over their 11 year old daughter's behaviour. We see her picking on, being nasty to and generally bullying the younger kids, her parents see her as an ickle angel.

bah! 3: still not finished my assignment, it has to be in tomorrow so I think I'll be up all night and stalking my tutor by going to her host to post it.

bah! 4: weighed self. Have settled back to my default weight ie 17.5 stones.

proud to fail the cricket test

Feck off Tebbit, we're rooting for Horny Warnie. I have applied the Ceremonial Sun Block.



R has taken the day off work so he can watch the last day of the last test of the Ashes series. I'm working but listening to TMS - cricket is always better on the wireless, but it's not the same without Johners.

What's your Aussie nickname? (Mine's "Sandgroper").

my cat is back!

He came home at 2 am this morning, very hungry and thirsty but otherwise seems OK. Maybe he read my blog and realised we were worried about him?

my cat's gone

One of our cats is missing, we have't seen him since Wednesday. Hope he comes home soon.

back to normal

O went back to school today, very excited about being in Year 1 and allowed to go on the Big Climbing Frame (off limits to Reception class & nursery, he's been desperate to get on it for 2 years). He has 2 teachers again this year, splitting the week between them. The first-half-of-the-week teacher unfortunately reminded me of Jill from the brilliantly awfully horribly painfully hideously brilliant Nighty Night. Candy pink eyeshadow is so not a good day-time look for anyone over the age of 12.

I have been Open Universiting like mad, got to get the last assignment of the course in by next Tuesday and it is v. hard physics eep and no chance of an extension, then straight after that we have to get an end of course assessment in. And this weekend I am already committed to visiting an old friend who's having a rough time, plus the usual Sunday bike ride. And a pile of work work to do, too. Oh and some work I have to do for the community association.

And I s'pose I'd better think about re-starting the weight loss groove thang, if only so I can improve my cycling times. My fat club meeting was cancelled but seems to have started up again. I can't go tomorrow (meetings meetings) but I should go next week. And start thinking about getting back to at least eating like a normal person instead of a crazed binger from hell.

In other news: my neighbours seem to have broken up then got back together, and added another woman into the mix, too. That's another thing on my to-do list: invite their 6 yr old round for tea and get the inside track on the menage-a-trois.

done it

It was the day of the 100 km bike ride today and we did it. I cycled to the start in the morning (and got a puncture on the way boo) so in total I've ridden 67.5 miles (108.5 km in new money). R & O were at the finish to cheer me and take a photo and buy me ice-creams. I've raised £250 for charidee - thanks to everyone who sponsored me xxxxx. CB and I have already agreed that next year we're doing the 100 miles.

In other news: we had a great holiday and I'll post more about it another day. Now I'm off to have a lovely bath and then eat the yummy tea R is cooking.