Like life, you start with 'DNA'
Making a Scooby may be child's play, but it sure ain't easy.
"Now, just watch me this time," instructed six-year-old Mia Seabrook. "Make a white loop. Now make a blue loop. Put the white string through the blue loop, put the blue one through the white loop. Now pull all the strings."
She gave the threads a yank and added yet another perfect segment to her keychain.
I was in a north London garden for a crash-course in Scoubidouing. Mia and her four friends were surrounded by garish key-chains and bracelets. With guides like this, how could I fail?
I followed Mia's example, made my loops and gave the strings a pull. The threads slipped helplessly past one another. "You have to concentrate really, really hard," said Mia.
I concentrated really, really hard and failed again. The girls began to laugh and my self-esteem plummeted.
"A Scoubidou pattern's always a big challenge when you first start," said nine-year-old Georgia Hayden. "That actually makes it more fun. And then, once you've learned how to do it, you can teach other people."
The other girls nodded. "Now try it slowly," said Mia. I went slower than a sedated pensioner in a Robin Reliant. I gave the strings a cautious tug. Suddenly the scoobies were irreversibly tangled in an ungainly knot.
"Tony, I just don't think you're ready for the square Scoubidou. You should probably try something a bit easier," said Georgia.
And with that I was unceremoniously demoted to the "DNA" model. DNA might be pushing it - the pattern looked more like a winding staircase than a double helix - but at least it was much simpler.
"Hey," I cried. "Look. I can do it. I can do it."
The girls were supremely unimpressed. "Of course you can," said Greta, Georgia's little sister. "That one's easy."
Children can be so cruel.
Lots of bike stuff on the cards today, tho not actual riding thereof. All our gears need their indexing sorted (all hail Mighty Sheldon, who knoweth all things) and we'll be watching stage 2 of le tour.