spirals

I feel like things are starting to spiral away from me again. The house is a mess (and I mean a mess, a sh!thole, a tip, even by my low standards), work's behind, course work's behind, money's a mess as usual, I'm eating too much cr@p and drinkin too much wine, there never seems to be enough time or energy or ... I dunno, enough of whatever 'normal' people have that lets them keep their house clean and their finances in order and hand their work in on time. If anyone has any spare, let me know.

Not all doom and gloom tho. I have put the notify list thingy on (see sidebar) so Jude'll be happy. Must do some work now - right after I've checked in my 43things, particularly this one and this one.

ok, I give up

Jude, I will put notify list on my blog if you tell me how to. I can't find anything about it on blogger ...

ummm ... what was I saying again?

Well as we all know now, email and txting rots ur brane. To find out exactly how much, take the gruaniad quiz.

It might not be email that has made you stupid, but something has, and coffee is now the only thing supporting your higher brain function. Was that sentence too long for you? Stop. Checking. Your. Email. Try reading something to rebuild your concentration. Start with the television listings. Work up to a magazine article.

See more progress on: Spend less time fooling around on the net and more time actually working

monday randomness

shaving: since we're on the subject, why do male cyclists shave their legs? The view from Just zis Guy and from Jobst Brand.

builders: actually builder singular, there is just one of him and he has to put the whole kitchen in by himself awww. Actually it is more of a teeny weeny kitchenette than a proper kitchen, so I don't think he's that hard done by. Had to spend yesterday evening clearing out all the cupboards tho boooo.

eating: goes from bad to worse. Didn't go to fatclub last week cos I was away but I don't want to go this week either cos I know it will be Bad. Waah.

geology: am on a geology-based unit of my course. Who knew rocks would be so interesting?

busy bee

sorry, have been v busy in the past few days. Lots of work at the end of last week, lots of home stuff to sort on Saturday, 30+ mile bike ride today (and getting the beginnings of a classic cyclist's tan). Normal service resumed tomorrow, promise. When I will make some people jealous by posting about having the builders in.

(oh and sorry to anyone who txt me and hasn't heard back, bit of a lost phone charger situation)

random whining

what is the point of on-line banking if they don't show the on-line payments you've just made?

why am I doing this instead of doing the work I absolutely have to do?

why can't I stop eating?

just how horrible is the meeting I have to go to tonight going to be and how much is everyone going to shout at me?

why did I buy O an electronic pokemon game from ebay that makes lots of noise?

why do people pay more for stuff on ebay than they could buy it for in the shops or elsewhere on line?

why is the daily mail?

why can't I understand how to play the stoopid pokeball game even after downloading the instructions?

amazing new research findings

from the bbc website today:

Playing 'better than lessons'for 4 & 5 year olds. No! Really? Actually they are allowed to play in the sand, they just have to call it science and numeracy work. Sigh.

'1 in 10 teenagers' visit 'adult' websites. And the other 9 were lying.

another day, another bike ride

R is still away, so my friend agreed to look after O so I could go for a ride today. We trail-a-biked the three miles there, the first outing it's had this year (some dusting and oiling and adjusting was necessary before we were ready to go). Dropped O at my friend's, went for a ride with CB, then back to collect O and ride home. I did 23 miles in all, he did 6. He didn't complain, he even seemed to enjoy it. Must get out with trailer bike more!

this is heaven, this is hell

It's all because I'm so lazy. I can be other than lazy but I have to make myself. Lazy is my default setting. I did manage to squeeze a small amount of work out of myself today, then it got to me again and I gradually stopped being productive. So I thought, I'm not going to get anything else done today. I can sit in this room staring at this screen doing feck all for the rest of the day, or I could actually go out of the house and do something.

I've been promising R to take him to see Robots for ages, so that's what we did. And being as how I'm being a lazy @rse, I decided it would be easier to drive to the Trafford Centre than take the bus to town.

Easier? Wtf was I thinking? Had to drive round looking for a parking space, then the walk from the space to the cinema was at least as far as from the bus stop to the cinema in town. And I'd forgot how much I hate shopping malls.

O enjoyed the film (unusually for him, his fave character was the baddie sweeper robots) but he enjoyed the venue more. Not because he likes shopping, oh no. Because he decided the food court, especially the arcade bit, is Pizza Planet from Toy Story made real. He didn't want to leave and worse, is already demanding to know when we are going again. Urggh. And all because I couldn't be @rsed to get the bus. Ah well, granny can take him, there'll be no keeping her away once the new John Lewis opens.

Anyone for the last few choc ices, now?

today's numbers: [sfx]hollow laughter[/sfx]

having a bad day

I feel like cr@p today. R's away this weekend at a conference. O's amusing himself watching Power Rangers Turbo for the n^th time and staging re-enactments of it as he watches. I should be doing some work I'm in a big pile of trouble if I don't have finished for Monday. But I can't do it. I have to somehow but right now I can't. So I'm reading the papers in bed instead. Bad me.

Gah, more stressfulness today. Some people really need a sharp poke with the clue stick.

Less cryptically, spent the morning on O's class trip to the museum then the afternoon dealing with plumbers and such. Am spending the evening drinking wine and eating nuts. Again. Tis becoming a v bad habit.

today's numbers: points allowance ~ 24; points used ~ 27; +/- for week ~ +11.5; exercise ~ 0; water ~ 0; booze ~ 2 (large) glasses wine; crisps ~ 0 (but there were pistachios)

not a nice day

Had a horrible job to do today, but at least it kept me busy. And it's all done and over with now (I hope). Watching the new wildlife prog tonight, I decided a world with rays in it isn't a bad place to live. Steve Leanord ain't a patch on David Attenborough, tho.

today's numbers: points allowance ~ 24; points used ~ 32.5; +/- for week ~ +8.5; exercise ~ belly dancing (60 min); water ~ 750 ml; booze ~ 2 (large) glasses wine; crisps ~ 0 (but there were pistachios)

just imagine if I didn't exercise

Gained 1.5 lb this week, not really a surprise after my ludicrious eating lately. If it wasn't for the excercise, I'd probably be back over the 17 st mark again.

Starting tomorrow, I am getting back to eating sensibly and writing everything down and pointing it all. I have allowed myself to get into this huge back slide, but I have to put an end to it now.

Please feel free to shout at me if I don't enter my points etc every day.

that was a stoopid thing to do

Cycle 6 miles (mainly up hill), go to more advanced belly dancing class, cycle 6 miles home. My legs hurt. Even tho I didn't actually cycle much of the way home as such, it was downhill most of the way so I free wheeled hurrah. I have no idea why fixies are the new black, when coasting down hills is so much fun (and almost makes pedalling up them worth while).

doing what judeee sez

OK I won't start smoking again. It's nasty and smelly and expensive (actually I can't imagine how I ever afforded it). I am dealing (not) with my bad feelings by eating fat 'n' carbs and pottering about ebay. I have bought a new handlebar bag and a Power Rangers Turbo Annual (that'll get O reading independently, as I refuse to read it to him). Some might say I would be better off actually getting on with some work but I say pah.

another day, another d*et disaster

Gah. I'm way behind with my work, I'm stressed and panicking, and I'm stuffing my face with cr@p like it's gonna help. I know it's one of the rubbishest excuses ever, but thoughts of smoking have seriously crossed my mind the past couple of days, so stuffing my face with cr@p is the better option right? OK don't answer that.

Mebe I'll take Cheeky Moo's word for it and call it a re-feed week hurrah.

Other news: O informed my tonight that he loves S more than me. But then he loves me more than S. I think he's trying to say that Mums are good for some things but for other things you need Gurls.

I have not gone to aquarobics tonight (bad) but tomorrow I'm planning my first 'cycle 7 miles, take advanced belly dance class, cycle 7 miles' outing. Bwaahahahahah.

command performance

Trin rang me up to demand that I blog something. I did try to blog summat yesterday but blogger ate my post.

I've been doing a pretty good job of sabotaging my earlier good works this week. I've eaten the calories burned during today's bike ride at least 3 times over. I've drunk far too much wine. I've eaten out 3 times and not been mindful of my food choices. I haven't pointed. I have at least kept up with exercise tho - several walks of varying length (20 - 40 mins), belly dancing and 3+ hours (31.5 miles⁴) on bike today. I will do better from tomorrow, I will I will I will.

Ms T is threatening suggesting visiting us at half-term, to show her gels the sights of Madchester. They wanna go shopping - she wants shopping hell but I reckon Abby'd rather hit Afflecks & the rest of the Northern Quarter,with maybe a visit to the sk8r bois near the cathedral. If they come on the right weekend, we could even visit the Garden of Delights. The Garden is handy for curry heaven but Ms T is some kind of curry-hating weirdo. She says she wants to visit the theatre of dreams (TM) too, but she'll have to go on her own.

Oh and O suddenly remembered the other day that he never got the promised bowling trip when we went to Brizzul, so we might have to do that. Trafford Centre could be a good idea, akshually - shops and cinema and bowling and bumper cars all together. And we could all go on a luverly bike ride to Lyme Park (speak to me not of Lyme, show me the spot where Mr Darcy dived¹).

Maybe Ms J might join us too?



1. Not that that happens in the book. The real Mr Darcy would not have done that. I am a Jane Austen fundamentalist and I complained bitterly² thro the BBC adaptation³

2. if bitterly = irritatingly pedantically

3. and don't get me started on Bridget Feckin Jones ...

4. I just realised, that's half a metric century⁵. Wooo.

5. Or 5280 times the length of a London Bus, in real terms

not a good idea

posting when drunked and in bad mood = v.bad idea

Garlic mayo seems like v good idea after half a bottle or so of spanish plonk. I am v. pished off at local hostelry tho grrr. I had one of my "let me speak to the manager" moments. Eep.

great expectations

It's not that I don't love my parents. I do, and for the past few years I've been getting on much better with them than I used to. I speak to my mum on the phone 2 or 3 times a week, I see them once a month or so, I fix their computer and raise no. 1 grandson. Things are good between us, but there's still stuff I chose not to tell them. Particularly stuff that's about things that have been big issues between us in the past. Two of the biggest have been my weight and my fecking up at university (having been chucked off my chemistry course for doing feck all work and failing my exams twice).

So I decided not to tell my parents that I was going to WW, or that I'd started a science course with the OU. Although things are better now, and I know they wouldn't go on about things the way the used to, I just didn't want the weight of their expectation on me. Probably more in my own head than in theirs, but it would get to me. It's kind of like what Marla was talking about - not wanting to do what you're 'supposed' to do, not conforming to all those expectations. The Bard of Barking wrote:

Love is just a moment of giving
And marriage is when we admit our parents were right

Going to WW and finishing my degree, that feels a lot like admitting my parents were like. I know I should grow up and get over it but I still don't like it.

Imagine how pleased I was to find out that when my mum rang the other night, R told her I was out at WW and went on to tell her about my course. OK so I should've told him I wasn't telling them but you'd think he'd've noticed that I never mention this stuff to them. Bah. Next time his mother phones on a Wednesday night, I'll tell her he's out at one of his regular revolutionary anarchist meetings and see how he likes it.

D*et news: eating not been so good the past couple of days and I'm way over my points . And I have less points now - dropping below 17 stone means I lose a point off my daily allowance boo. We're going out tonight, there will be wine and (some) food, but I'm going to eat a sensible meal at home first.

Couple of NSVs today. Bumped into an acquaintance while wearing my new cheapo, snug-fitting-for-now, bike jacket and he said how fit I was looking. The belt I bought last year, I can now comfortably do up 4 notches smaller than when I first got it. My shape is improving even if my weight is taking longer. I should probably track proper measurements but I am allergic to tape measures.

need to know?

The Gruaniad asked some scientists "what is the one thing everyone should learn about science?" and published some of the answers they got. Makes interesting reading, and the full list should be interesting, too.

D*et News: is it less bad to have chip barm for lunch if you cycle to the chippy?

Pope Still Dead

A journo on the radio this morning called him "The People's Pope". I nearly threw up in my porridge. I do not understand all the enormous hoo-hah about an old man dying. I don't wish anyone dead¹ but he was an old man, if you believe in that kind of thing he's gone to heaven,and there'll be another pope along shortly. The papal succession, now that is quite interesting (tho I'm a bit worried that one of Dan "Da Vinci Code" Brown's other books is going to encourage a raft of conspiracy lunacy around it all, particularly with this "secret cardinal" business).

So I'm not 'glad' he's dead or anything, but I didn't like him much - here's just one reason why ...

The devil sent half of all new HIV infections to people under the age of 25, most of them women in developing countries, to taunt him, but JPII steadfastly presided over cardinals, bishops, priests and nuns in four continents, spreading the message that HIV can pass through tiny holes in condoms, discouraging use of barrier contraception, and making this a better world for us all. Bravo.

(from today's Bad Science column)

Let's hope the new chap is better, whoever he may be. Seems unlikely, tho.


1. except Thatcher obv. Be throwing a street party when she goes

about time, too

Weigh in tonight, finally lost my first half stone (7 lb/3.2 kg). It's only taken me 12 weeks (big sigh, rolls eyes).

I have actually lost 3.5 lb since last meeting 3 weeks ago. Cycling works, then.

I hate my legs

I want to go to sleep but my legs won't let me. Fidget jiggle wriggle fidget. It's my come-uppance for drinking wine again - alcohol can sometimes (tho not always) make it worse. I have some pills for it but there's not much point taking them now - they take a while to work, and if I take them this late I know I'll have cotton wool for brains all morning tomorrow; also you're not supposed to mix them with booze. Bah.

just a bit of fun

I was wrong. Election news is not more interesting that Pope Still Dead news. Even though I am bored of it all already, I spect I shall be staying up all night on election night, without even a Portillo moment to look forward to. Ah well, there's always Peter Snow in his socks with his swingometer. And if you can't wait, well you can slip your shoes off and be your own Peter Snow in the comfort of your own home hurrah.

getting back to it

Quite a busy weekend. Went on demo on Saturday - O protested bitterly at being made to go but then enjoyed himself running about Albert Square with the other kids, particularly when the sound system crusties turned their bubble machine on. [old person moan] why do we always have to be subjected to crusties' ambient techno and crusties' "samba" bands on demos? just because we're lefties doesn't mean we've no taste in music. [/old person moan]

The Tories' vile pre-election posters are all over the feckin place. "Are we thinking what they're thinking?" they ask, inviting us to agree with their Mail-Reader friendly questions. "It's not racist to impose limits on immigration" and "I mean, how hard is to keep a hospital clean" are two of them. So I particularly liked this placard seen on the demo:

There has been some quality subervtising of billboards (so I suppose crusties are good for something).

Which is probably about the only thing to look forward to in the election campaign (Memo to self: borrow spray can from local youths and add "you should know, you privatised all the cleaning" to the next "how hard is it?" poster I see). Oh and having news bulletins saying something other than "Pope Still Dead" on the hour every hour, that might be a nice change.

Belly dancing party was good on Saturday night, I stayed off the WKD and had vodka & diet coke instead. Less calories but more caffeine, couldn't get to sleep for hours. Did 16 mile bike ride on Sunday, northwards, towards where there are Hills. Had to get off and push for some of the way, but I suppose uphill cycling will get easier as I develop more gears in my legs (and as there's less of me to haul up the hills, too).

Everything back to normal from today, back to work, back to pointing, yawn yawn it's so boring yawn. Going to skip aquarobics cos I'm behind on my course work and we have a tutorial tomorrow, so I need to get some cramming in.

booze luverly booze

oh dear, I may be in danger of undoing all my good works on holidays. After not drinking at all for 10 days, have had wine 3 nights running. And tomorrow night is belly dancing party. I wish the nice people at WKD would hurry up and bring out Diet Orange WKD.

how far?

I reckon I cycled about 55 miles in total on holiday. That's 9220 times the length of a London bus, fact fans. Or four-fifths of the length of Hadrian's Wall. Cor.

Hurrah for Mr Kelk's amazing bus-o-meter!

jolly holidays

Back home, hurrah. We did have a good time but nearly 2 weeks in close proximity with family (particularly someone else’s family), always having to be on one’s best behaviour, is a bit of a strain. And I missed my own bed and my own things and my own broadband connection¹.

Did mostly OK with staying on plan. I’m not saying I didn’t eat any biscuits or easter eggs, but I did say ‘no’ most times the biscuit tin came round. Didn’t get all of the exercise I’d planned on (no swimming, and no walking cos R’s dad has a bad leg) but did get some cycling in. Two long (20+) miles rides (on even including uphill stretches) and some shorter rides too.

R’s family were rather bemused by my new found interest in exercise, being more used to me sitting on t he sofa with my head in a book munching biscuits, but were gratifyingly impressed by my exertions. I really enjoyed my rides, even if I did have to get off and push sometimes. Cycling on country lanes is definitely nicer than busy urban/suburban roads. Eventually I would like to go on cycling holidays – maybe starting off by ‘credit card touring’ (with a Credit Card Touring Cyclist's Credit Card, natch) exploring the new Felpersham canal cycle paths.

I’ve had a quick check on my own scales, and it doesn’t look like I’ve gained. Back to WW next week for official weigh in. Now I’m off to catch up on everyone else’s blogs.


1. I'd been hoping to get on-line either at R's brother's or at cybercaff. Local cybercaff had closed down boo and R's bro's interweb connection wasn't working. Bizzarely he was not on the phone to his ISP day and night demanding to be reconnected. Strange man.